Tuesday, July 03, 2007

There are some things in this life I have wanted and desired but never the pastor of my church. We have had some handsome ministers over the years who headed up our congregation but never once have I thought I must have him. Better still never have I ever disrespected the pastor's wife either.

I recently published A Pastor’s Wife Does Cry! Honestly I must say that I have reviewed & published many books but none ever affected me as this one did. As I read this book I went through many emotions like anger, happiness, and sadness and even I wanted revenge. The book is about a first lady of a large church. She discussed her feelings and mistreatment at the hands of supposedly Christian women whose primary objective was not to walk through the pearly gates of Heaven but to ride the minister and not like in a car.

A passage out of the book:
Pam is a member in the church. Claxton Morgan is the Pastor.

Pam drove Claxton to all of his preaching engagements, Pastor’s anniversary services, and funerals. When we held funerals, she drove him to the cemetery when he could have ridden in the hearse. All of these acts of foolishness were done without me; sometimes without my knowledge or consent. Pastor Morgan was held up so long on Sundays with his clique. I would wait for him so that we could eat together. He started saying, “Just put me some food up, I’ll eat it later.” When he came home he’d say, “I’m not hungry” or he’d say, “I don’t have a taste for anything right now.” Then I learned that he was going out to eat every Sunday with his armor bearer and a few other ladies. That was deception! That was the beginning of the end of our family meals together.

The Pastor’s Wife Does Cry!

Another passage from the book is when two friends ended their relationship because each was vying to win the pastor.

Airika betrayed her friend Willimina, to become friends with my husband. Isn’t that a wonderful friend to have? She started cooking for him. I don’t know how much of her cooking he has had, but I do remember her sending Claxton, by one of the ministers, one slice of lasagna and one half slice of Texas toast. I was sitting in the car with one of our members who had ridden with us to hear the Pastor preach. The minister handed me the food and told me who it was from. She just hugged me inside of the church and said, “Praise the Lord, First Lady.”

She could have handed me the food. I was heated because of the deception. When Claxton got into the car, I said, “Here.” He said, “What’s that?” I said, “Food from Airika.” He said, “Ok, I’ll nibble on it later.” I said, “You didn’t nibble on that chili I cooked for dinner.” I know that the elderly lady in the back seat wanted to high five me, but I heard her chuckle a little. When we got home, Claxton fixed a bowl of chili and came into the basement where I was and said, “I want you to see me eating your chili otherwise it was going to be a world war.”

She was really trying hard to get his attention. At one of our banquets, she wore a sleeveless spaghetti strapped dress with no jacket or shawl. After the program was over, I saw her standing near Claxton, looking over her shoulders every few minutes to see if he was looking at her. The Lord brought it to my attention.

What and who was she waiting for, “I thought?” He was busy shaking hands and thanking people for coming and she was steadily waiting. When we finally left, we congregated in the lobby of the hotel, you know how we do, and we ended up standing outside in front of the hotel. Airika began walking to her car and then she yelled to Claxton as he was talking to the members, “Pastor! Quit watching me walk! I see you, you can’t keep your eyes off of me.” Everybody looked and she kept walking knowing that everybody was looking at her and thinking about what she had said. Claxton was too embarrassed. That statement was also made to make me think that she and Claxton had something going on.

My thoughts as a reader:
Now don’t get me wrong, I was mad at the Pastor for allowing his wife to be mistreated and disrespected. He turned a blind eye to things because he enjoyed the attention or for whatever. I was angry at the church members for totally disrespecting this lady while pretending to be Christians. I was equally pissed at the first lady for standing back and letting these women destroy her marriage. To me she didn’t fight or intervene because she believed that God would handle it. After all, HE said revenge is mine. The pastor’s wife was living as a Christian woman. She did not step out of her role based on her words. I guess that is why I am not a pastors’ wife because I would have been a strong woman to contend with and they would have felt my wrath.

This book was written by Lady Bea Morgan who is still a first lady in the church. It can be purchased from Amazon.com.


Anonymous said...

That kind of behavior from women in the church ticks me off, and I always see it. He is married, he is off limits and the women who do this are NOT Christians. And I would have addressed it too. I believe that God will handled any issue, sometimes thru using you or someone else. Address the issue. It sounds like a great book.


Miz JJ said...

That is so nasty. What is wrong with women that they need to go after other people's husbands? Could there be anything more unChristian? I would have told my husband off. He needs to be saying "I have a wife, this is inappropriate". Everytime a woman offers him a ride, everytime a woman brings him dinner. Everytime. I do not expect any other woman to have any loyalty to me or my relationship, but I do expect my husband to have my back and to not let me be made a fool of.

kathi said...

I believe that some people's lives are lacking the joy they see others have, so they go after what seems to be the source of that joy. They're also missing that part that most of us have that says 'huh uh...don't go there', otherwise known as a concious.

kathi said...

*conscious :) sorry.

Belizegial said...

I think Kathi meant to say 'conscience'. that little voice that speaks volumes to us when we are about to 'f..k up' on any given day

A lot of single women find married men extremely hot. the unavailability factor plays a a huge role in this type of scenario. a 'married man of god' just makes the prize at the end of the chase, that much more delectable.

Paula D. said...

Who would have thought? A mess!

Rosemarie said...

About the Author
Lady Bea Morgan is married to a pastor in the state of Colorado. This is her first account of her life as a first lady. A Pastor s Wife Does Cry is her first book.

Women are ruthless and husbands need to keep their fantasies at home with their wives.

I suppose God restored! Interesting story. Something I would certainly be interested in purchasing for myself.

Congratulations Rose!

princessdominique said...

Wow I'd love to interview her and the book does sound really really good. I'm thinking about starting a book club at church.

kathi said...

Have mercy, my mind must be on it's way out. Thanks, belizegial, that's exactly what I meant. :)

Rose said...

Lady Bea Morgan would love to interview Princess, just let me know and I'll send the info. Unfortunately, she is going through so much and since she has released the book much is hitting the fan. Though, she has not revealed her true identity, she doesn't want to discourage the members of the church, I do believe that her book will make so many people think before they destroy families with the assistance of those to weak to fight.

Lady Bea Morgan said...

Hello to all! I pray that you are blessed by my book. I thank God that hatred lies not in my heart. I am determined to go to Heaven and no devil, no husband, no church, or no hypochristian will block it. I find your comments interesting. I am free now! I can share my experiences with others, especially First Ladies. Read my blog at ladybmorgan.blogspot.com. e-mail me ladybmorgan@yahoo.com.

Rosemarie, restoration has not taken place yet but separation has.

Princessdominique, I'm free to speak. I was in bondage, but he who is free is free indeed!

Be blessed everyone and know that if God can't do it, it can't get done.

Rose, thanks for everything!

Lady Bea Morgan

Nic said...

Wow! This seems like a crazy-good book. I can hardly read things like that anymore (dealing with relationships & betrayl) though. Just gives me anxiety attacks.

BostonPobble said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BostonPobble said...

I deleted this the first time I wrote it because I hadn't edited it and the typos were Just Too Much. So, here's the comment, with edits. :)

While reading this, I kept waiting for the part where she picks up her sword and fights for her man. Based on your insight, I assume that part didn't come. So, I am right there with you: pissed at the women who went after him; pissed at him for allowing it; and pissed at her for sitting back meekly. HOWEVER! My anger is mostly at the societal influences that encourage women to strike out against each other and/or sit back and take it. So many times I have heard the line "Well, if she wanted him, she would fight so she must not want him" or "If I just let him have his fling, he'll come back to me." Aw hell no! We must, as women, stop this behavior. We must, as women, stand up for ourselves. I am relieved to read her comment that she has separated from him and is gaining back her sense of self!

On an unrelated note ~ I totally dropped the ball on the book club. The title wasn't available at my library and I haven't been over to explain. I'm really, really sorry!

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

I just dropped by to say hello. I'm new at your blog but with your indulgence, my I venture to make a commnent?

Like all human endeavors, church activities, even involving the pastor, can lead to consequences other than those envisioned by the pioneer Church Fathers of old. Maybe that's because some Christians have deviated from, 'Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith." (Hebrews 12:2a) They have focussed on the mundane side of ecclesiastical activities. Very saddening indeed.

Thank you very much for the very interesting post. May I invite you to visit my blog too.

God bless you with all the best things in life.

Dr. Deb said...

It is always a treasure when a book touches your life like that.

Kayla said...

That type of behavior is disrespectful in so many ways. While, this may make for an interesting read, it's not something I'd pick up. Just the title alone is disheartening. I'm not sure I'd actually make it through the end.

Momma Bear said...

What a story. I must get that book. There was a situation in one of our churches here in Iowa. That pastor has moved out of the city but the new pastor has not been able to get the respect of the other one -- they want him back. Tsk, tsk, tsk

I have missed all of you. I lost my old blog when Google took over. I have tried and tried to recover it. Have not been able to post for quite some time. Thanks to good old Brotha Buck, I'm back in business again.

I had a great 4th of July. Hope you did too.

I am contacting you through my new blog. You know me as Mz. Gig but I had to change to momma bear. I look forward to reading your blog and renewing our friendship.

Rosemarie said...


You've been linked!

Rosemarie said...

I have completed the book and published the final book review. Next week I will be adding my review on Amazon in full.


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