Tuesday, October 24, 2006



Sipping my coffee and saying, "That's Stupid."



It's been in the papers and on the news about this dancer, Sara Evans starring on Dancing with the Stars and her personal marital problems with her husband and their nanny. Why is it that women hire young beautiful nannies to keep their children and home? Too many times the husband ends up having sex with the nanny and the marriage is over. If I needed a nanny I would hire a sweet little old granny type. Why put your husband in the position of being near a woman who is the caretaker of the family? This nanny is cooking, taking care of your children, some pay bills, clean, etc. I have heard men say, "If the nanny is doing everything, why do I need a wife?" Plus if the man is wealthy, who is to say the beautiful, young lady is not flirting with the husband? My concern is this. The flesh is weak and so are humans, so why put that kind of temptation in the face of the husband or wife. I've heard this happens too many times, remember Robin Williams, and the man (John) who left his wife for Bo Derek and so many others who this happened too.

Another thing! Why are some women in denial about their spouses’ sexual preference when the signs are so clear? A young lady said, she opened up her husbands' computer and she found nothing but sites for homosexuality. Apparently he had even downloaded a naked man as his screen saver. She stated in front of several of us to her friends that she feared her husband was gay and not being upfront. I overheard her friends tell her to leave because he is gay, they could tell. The wife said, "I don't think he is gay, I think he is just freaky." Geez! Are there more women who have seen signs about down low men and ignored them?

13 comments:

African girl, American world said...

freaky?? *smh* what in the world? It is cases like that that are hopeless. maybe when he suggests a 3some involving another man (for him) that the lightbulb will go off.
And yeah...I don't understand wehy people hire young hot nannies...I had someone a couple of years older than me live with me and help me the kids and the stress alone of having another person in the house was enuff for me. I was grateful for her help but happy when it was over.
My husband suggested a grandma type but I come from a culture where even that would problematic cause she would probably tell me over and over what I was doing wrong!!! LOL.

http://abeautifulmess.bloggoing.com

Luke Cage said...

I chuckled to myself when you said that her girlfriends told her that her husband may be gay and she said that he's probably freaky. That's the problem right there. This DL thing has really got the women shook to the point of not reading the signs when they are clear as day, and then there's the embarrassment factor.

After all, what woman would admit that she's been with a man who was on the DL all along? I still don't get the whole thing. As a heterosexual man, if you are gay, be out about it to your spouse. Please don't marry the woman and falsify your sexual preference, or if you do go both ways, let her know.

That's not right to hide that about you. Eventually, both lifestyles have a way of coming to a head. As for the nannie thing, hmmm. I don't particularly get that either. To each their own. I don't need that kind of temptation. ;)

Shana said...

wow. . . that's a mess. She obviously doesn't want to face the truth. To blow off homosexuality as some kind of freaky tendency is crazy. This down low bull has gotten too many people thinking that this kind of thing is ok . . . DL brothas think of themselves as freaks and not actually homosexuals. . .what the heck ever. . . if you are a man who likes men you are gay . . . and if her husband likes men then he is gay . . . I don't even want to discuss the drama that is considered bisexuality . . . I'd be ranting for days

Nevah~ said...

One rule my mom always said, don't allow another woman in your house or she will claim your house as her house.

I think a lot of women don't want to believe what they know is gut truth. Denying is safe to accept what is known. Why? I don't know.

chele said...

If I needed a nanny I would hire a man.

I used to work with a woman who's husband hadn't had sex with her in many years. She found his porn and it was full of pics of Black men (he's white). She said she didn't understand ... I understood but I wasn't going to be the one to tell her.

Michelle said...

I guess what they say is true -- love is blind or at the very least it makes you turn a blind eye to the truth. People want to believe what they want to believe. But in that woman's heart she has to know her hubby is gay! And as far as attractive nannies -- look at fine ass Jude Law who slept with his nanny and it was splashed all over the news -- his fiance stayed after learning the truth! When will women learn!???

Ananda said...

i don't know why folks don;t tell themselves the truth. i think it means they might have to face the reality of examining themselves and the choices they made in selecting mates. it always points back to us. that means healing work. and healing work can get very messy. i think lots of folks including myself have run from the healing work at one time or another. at some point, we have to face the music. i am learning to surrender to the healing work despite its messiness. in the long run, i am learning that it brings greater peace to face the truth, accept responsibility for my choices, and heal and be whole. peace and love, ananda

ps: thanks for stopping by my blog. you have a great blog. i'll be back. keep sharing

Hasan Mubarak said...

I agree with your point of view that if the nanny is young, beautiful, and performs all the tasks that a good wife should, then why the husband will need his wife!!

Shawn said...

Perhaps the husbands are just a cheats at heart. Yea, his cheating was made easier by having a "hot thang" in his own house.

for_the_lonely said...

LOL! I think that for anyone to have nude pictures of the same sex on their screen saver is a certain sign of being gay! Take it from me on that one! LOL

I hope that you have a wonderful weekend!

Love,
Sarah

Sugar said...

Rose, you hit the nail on the head! I consider myself to be an attractive woman, but there isn't a way in hell that I would bring some little young girl into my house to take care of my family, because you are right, the flesh is so weak and men especially can't hold it together.

Great post.

Alina said...

Well, actually very old nannies are not that good for the kids, just like having them brought up by grandparents might not be that healthy because of the age difference.

As for not submitting men to temptations, if we believed that policy to be true, then men and women should never: work in the same building, dine at the same restaurants, work out at the same gym. Let's face it, temptation is everywhere, both for men and women. The question is how you deal with it...

Finding a good nanny is always extremely hard, therefore her looks should relly not be a hiring standard...If the husband has an affair with the nanny, that does not mean he wouldn't have had an affair with a different woman, from his office for example, if the wife hired an ugly nanny.

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